我必須談論這樣的事件。阿，上一秒鐘清晰的意識到我同大部份的人，談論那一件件，終將消逝在風中的事件，而事件由人所造成的，為此我更感受到我同那些小人，談論他人。
但相較以往，這事件引發了想法，算是一個奇妙的自我探索。
起初我憤怒，智商降低至八歲，接著，人的內心真的奧秘，不是嗎，下一秒一切都不盡相同了，同時微顫的發現我的同理心竟是這樣的佔據我大部份的行動因素。我想，她的感受不正是我切身經歷過的嗎，接下來是一連串平庸的延伸問題。
總而言之，曾經以科學，理性客觀的角度來面對外界（總是面無表情或硬扭個弔鬼的笑回應他人）時常能安撫我。現在，撤開那些機械性。相對的，那些愁，那柔和的線條以及飄在空的美好，那二十歲的人常會有的極深層抑鬱，教導我的反而更多。
今天我獨自一人（當然，同時碰到了另外八百個人，不過我確信我今天前所未有的獨自一人）
，沒有在第一刻感到全然的自由令我不禁洩氣，但接下而來的思辨（僅需兩個小時），使我渙然一新，而且向自己發誓，將來要有千千萬萬個這樣的日子。

There is a community of the spirit.
Join it, and feel the delight
of walking in the noisy street
and being the noise.
Drink all your passion,
and be a disgrace.
Close both eyes
to see with the other eye.
Open your hands,
if you want to be held.
Sit down in the circle.
Quit acting like a wolf, and feel
the shepherd’s love filling you.
At night, your beloved wanders.
Don’t accept consolations.
Close your mouth against food.
Taste the lover’s mouth in yours.
You moan, “She left me.” “He left me.”
Twenty more will come.
Be empty of worrying.
Think of who created thought!
Why do you stay in prison
when the door is so wide open?
Move outside the tangle of fear-thinking.
Live in silence.
Flow down and down in always
widening rings of being.

the party is over.

深刻思想_第一章

追求辰星

在金魚缸中

了殘生

"the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars..." -jack kerouac